I need an editor please.

whoever said plastic was not that lovable after all ( i did, and still do, that later), bu look at these lovely, succulent, rounded , dimpled pieces of abs plastic. they are my joy, each time i press one of them, its a step further into my own world of being content in my own company, where i have my own thoughts for toys, my own image gallery that i could go on reliving for an entire lifetime , if need be, that is.

i know i know i know. i don't write like this usually.
ive been reading about a lovable, real, hate able , famous pedophile, dear mr Nabokov haunted me last evening, everywhere i looked, id find yet another book by him, and then i would wonder why i was looking at that book, that Russian name yet again, given the covers were particularly ordinary. while their more flashy comrades took a backseat in that ah, soulful bookstore i have come to love with every inch of my living being.


so this creature, Humbert Humbert,a man of almost 40 is in love, (love? ) with a 12 year old. and i didn't want to kill the suspense for myself, so i haven't read, how and why, i have encountered his dark, sinned, but intelligently retrospective confession.

if you do something 'wrong' and don't think its wrong- is your being cold blooded the only plausible reason?
at various junctures this week, i have encountered similar questions, and dismissed them to a growing sense of indiscipline.
and the whole cycle of thoughts from how India- has essentially survived as a repository of 'humanness' is cause , perhaps, youth as a body were, for a very very long time given little or no space for free thought and action.rules and conventions have regulated every breath an individual took, right from his birth, to well, the very last.

we've had our decent share of way wards, alright, but then they were always way wards.or so it has been communicated down the generations. books tell me, earliest civilizations of the Indian sub continent were as bohemian as could be, but certain other people, perhaps with a discerning idea and fore thought, gradually came in place to dictate notions, culture and mentalities.

at this point, im very Keen on deconstructing Indian marriages against this canvas. why they survived, how we've cultivated our women, and what our idea of a family has come to be. and stayed therefore , almost until now.

quite clearly, its breaking, divorcees are on the loose, i hear live in relationships are a fad, and single parents are one of the biggest fish in the market of emotional gamblers these days.

and gradually too (its not that gradual any more, that you sit back and listen to me with a slow nod and a smoking pipe), there little or no difference between what Indian young people are, and their peers in the united states.

ive had little or no contact with actual individuals to support my theory, and id be more than happy to be proved wrong on this.
i hear people screeching about globalisation, and i discover its saddening me. i must be abnormal, or old school, or just plain dumb.
fixed ideas, as my father offers every time i decide to speak my mind to him.(generation gap, that too, later).